I’m still considering asking Reggie, my neighbor, if he knows a drug dealer who sells Valium.
I’m fine. I’ll be in the studio in two hours.
But apparently getting Valium legally is harder than buying plutonium.
I guess I’d have to buy a burner phone, meet some guy at a secret location and use a password.
“The raccoon flies at midnight.”
“Are you here for the Valium?”
“Shhh! Jesus Christ, man.”
Is this drug dealer on Yelp? Can I check his reviews?
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
“Excellent service. Very discreet. Parking was a little difficult.”
His name is probably Doctor Doolittle.
Is he FDA approved?
No idea.
That’s the crazy part. I’m half joking, but I’m half serious.
You tell a doctor you’re in serious pain and they start worrying about whether you might become addicted to something.
I’m old. What do they think I’m going to do, start a Valium cartel out of my trailer?
My logic would be pretty simple: if the pain gets unbearable, take the medication. If the pain isn’t bad, don’t take it.
Their logic is protocol.
My logic is: I hurt now.
Their logic is: You might have a problem later.
Problem later , I’m waiting on what breaks next
I forgot if I almost had prostate cancer or colon
I think what is breaking now, is known as memory loss
Well, Doc, I already have a problem.
THAT’S WHY I’M HERE.
Anyway, enough about my promising new career in organized crime.
I’ve got a studio session in two hours.
Apparently outlaw country is easier to get into than outlaw pharmaceuticals.
I guess the Golden years means you start talking to dogs , Well they make more sense .
Them little charts with funny faces on how much pain your in . When I punch you in the mouth, you can point to one
Cuz you did not give me pain pills that you should have done in the first place.
Doctor Elvis what do you see on my CT scan . All your parts are looking good . But you will have nasty divorce in 6 months, is it fatal ? I’m afraid so.
I’m still considering asking Reggie, my neighbor, if he knows a drug dealer who sells Valium.
I’m fine. I’ll be in the studio in two hours.
But apparently getting Valium legally is harder than buying plutonium.
I guess I’d have to buy a burner phone, meet some guy at a secret location and use a password.
“The raccoon flies at midnight.”
“Are you here for the Valium?”
“Shhh! Jesus Christ, man.”
Is this drug dealer on Yelp? Can I check his reviews?
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
“Excellent service. Very discreet. Parking was a little difficult.”
His name is probably Doctor Doolittle.
Is he FDA approved?
No idea.
That’s the crazy part. I’m half joking, but I’m half serious.
You tell a doctor you’re in serious pain and they start worrying about whether you might become addicted to something.
I’m old. What do they think I’m going to do, start a Valium cartel out of my trailer?
My logic would be pretty simple: if the pain gets unbearable, take the medication. If the pain isn’t bad, don’t take it.
Their logic is protocol.
My logic is: I hurt now.
Their logic is: You might have a problem later.
Problem later , I’m waiting on what breaks next
I forgot if I almost had prostate cancer or colon
I think what is breaking now, is known as memory loss
Well, Doc, I already have a problem.
THAT’S WHY I’M HERE.
Anyway, enough about my promising new career in organized crime.
I’ve got a studio session in two hours.
Apparently outlaw country is easier to get into than outlaw pharmaceuticals.
I guess the Golden years means you start talking to dogs , Well they make more sense .
Them little charts with funny faces on how much pain your in . When I punch you in the mouth, you can point to one
Cuz you did not give me pain pills that you should have done in the first place.
Doctor Elvis what do you see on my CT scan . All your parts are looking good . But you will have nasty divorce in 6 months, is it fatal ? I’m afraid so.